What if you got so much good stuff out of dealing with conflict that you no longer viewed it as a burden or a waste of time, but as the most valuable and precious part of your teaching day? |
A Tale of Two Dogs
Allow me to introduce two friends. In the first picture, the late great Jedidiah Wiggle-bottom. Possibly the cutest, softest dog in the world. In the second picture, Nykka, a rescued shepherd with three legs and a well-documented past of trauma. When people looked at Jed, they saw a dog that looked perfect. Gentle, sweet, friendly. When people look at Nykka, they see a dog that has clearly suffered. No one can meet Nykka without their sense of compassion being activated.
Well, Jed harboured a few secrets; he carried his trauma deep inside where it was not visible 99% of the time. But it was there, and it could be tapped into by other dogs. It created a set of behaviours that were so at odds with his nature that it was difficult to know how to respond.
In our classrooms, we have children with a variety of challenges and hidden traumas. My work as an educator has been a life-long process of learning how to gather a group of individual children into a unit, a team, a family. This means starting with the assumption that every new friend in my classroom is dragging their little suitcase of emotional baggage. Some of them will try to hit me over the head with it on the first day; some will go to unbelievable lengths to hide it from me.
But my goal is always the same: One day, I will sit with each and every child and let them unpack that suitcase while I listen. And a good school year means saying good-bye to kids carrying much lighter bags. Better yet, finding most of those bags left behind and forgotten as the children run into their future a little lighter and a little stronger.
Well, Jed harboured a few secrets; he carried his trauma deep inside where it was not visible 99% of the time. But it was there, and it could be tapped into by other dogs. It created a set of behaviours that were so at odds with his nature that it was difficult to know how to respond.
In our classrooms, we have children with a variety of challenges and hidden traumas. My work as an educator has been a life-long process of learning how to gather a group of individual children into a unit, a team, a family. This means starting with the assumption that every new friend in my classroom is dragging their little suitcase of emotional baggage. Some of them will try to hit me over the head with it on the first day; some will go to unbelievable lengths to hide it from me.
But my goal is always the same: One day, I will sit with each and every child and let them unpack that suitcase while I listen. And a good school year means saying good-bye to kids carrying much lighter bags. Better yet, finding most of those bags left behind and forgotten as the children run into their future a little lighter and a little stronger.
Positive Conflict and Problem-Solving Workshop Outline
Positive Conflict
Problem Solving
Problem-solving is a term from Life Space Crisis Intervention. In a nutshell, problem-solving is a way to talk with kids in crisis. It is a useable format that allows us to be mindful during conflict. The process helps the student reach positive outcomes, and it strengthens our relationship with the student. (This workshop presents the "Reader’s Digest" version of LSCI!)
- avoiding conflict
- understanding conflict
- conflict styles
- the conflict cycle (based on the work of Dr. Nicholas J. Long)
- benefits of conflict
Problem Solving
Problem-solving is a term from Life Space Crisis Intervention. In a nutshell, problem-solving is a way to talk with kids in crisis. It is a useable format that allows us to be mindful during conflict. The process helps the student reach positive outcomes, and it strengthens our relationship with the student. (This workshop presents the "Reader’s Digest" version of LSCI!)
Conflict is an inevitable part of life. The goal of my workshop presentations is to shift thinking toward the positive side of conflict and how to use conflict to strengthen relationships rather than erode them. |
Workshop Feedback
Monica presented a workshop on working with and supporting students having difficulties fitting in the school system. Her presentation was both engaging and inspirational. She guided us with humour and stories. She introduced “problem solving” as a term for talking as well as providing opportunities for students to be listened to without judgement. Monica’s workshop has led to on-going discussions amongst the staff. We hope to work with her again in the future. –Melinda Gaberel, Principal, Cedar Elementary
This was a workshop for any school, district or agency working with children prone to conflict. Based in Life Space Crisis Intervention theory, Monica’s presentation provided a framework in which to break down and examine the conflict cycle. Infused with entertaining anecdotal stories taken from her experiences teaching challenging youth, the workshop offered many strategies on how to manage conflict. I thoroughly enjoyed this pro-d experience and would strongly recommend it to teachers, administrators and parents. –Tim Hicken, District Elementary Counsellor, SD72
Anonymous Comments from Past Workshop Participants
Thank you so much! I really enjoyed your session. I learned some great strategies on how to resolve conflicts (both in my class and in my personal life, too).
Amazing! It was relevant, applicable, heartfelt and exactly what I needed to hear today. I loved the humour and personal stories - they made it so meaningful and accompanied the slides well. The slides were easy to read and follow, as well. Thanks again!!
Fantastic content, very practical. Great pace, plenty of time for discussion and reflection. You made us feel relaxed and listened to . . . love the stories and visuals. We hugely appreciate it when you come. Thank you!
Explore a Positive Conflict & Problem-Solving Workshop with Monica
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