MONICA NAWROCKI
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Wondering Allowed

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"How do I know what I think until I see what I wrote?"
​(Thanks E.M.)

Coming out at long last

4/12/2018

6 Comments

 
Although I have never really been completely “in the closet,” I recently realized that I have never actually come out publicly. I’m tired of watching what I say; scanning the room for people who might react negatively. So, at the tender age of 52, let me say once and for all, that I am a Toronto Maple Leaf’s fan.
This will not come as news to my family and friends. They have known for a long time and while it has caused some tension, for the most part, everyone accepts this part of who I am.
For those of you who are shocked by this revelation, let me suggest that you probably know lots of Leaf fans. Your boss, your cousin, maybe even someone in your immediate family. We are everywhere. And while we have been silent for a long time, we are finding our voices. We are standing up and declaring with pride that we will love who we love.
And we love the Leafs.
Yes, I can hear you cynics out there. Sure, now you come out. Now that they have a good team and are headed for the playoffs.
Admittedly, it’s easier to be a fan these days. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t pay my dues. We had some tough times. I remember the days when we sought each other out furtively to whisper about Palmateer’s twelfth knee surgery; to trash-talk Harold Ballard; to relive Sittler’s ten-point-game.
People ask me when I knew for sure that I was a Leaf’s fan. I guess, on some level, I have always known. I remember watching games when I was just a little girl. There was something about that blue maple leaf that spoke to me like nothing else. I have tried to do what was expected of me; I cheered for the local team as I moved from province to province. But I knew it wasn’t real. Somewhere deep inside me, a whisper chanted softly, Go Leafs, go.
I don’t anticipate a backlash. Except maybe from the far right (Montreal), but I have confidence it will be okay. When I came out about that other thing in my twenties, I was happily surprised to find most people were supportive.
So here I am. I can cheer for all Canadian teams, really. But my hockey truth is blue and white. My heart is with my Maple Buds.
                                  WE’RE HERE. WE CHEER. GET USED TO IT.
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6 Comments
Michael Whalen
4/12/2018 12:25:08 pm

Hahaha! So good! Love reading your posts Monica.
I was born a Canadiens fan and have spent most of my life scorning & ridiculing Leafs fans, however ... I don’t have much to come back with. This year.
Like most Canadians I will be cheering for whatever Canadian team is actually in the playoffs so Go Jets!!!! and Go .....
Ok if they’re the ONLY Canadian team left I’ll say it🤪
Thanks again for another great read M

Reply
Diane Marshmallow
4/12/2018 12:52:09 pm

How did I not know this dark secret about you? Helmuthead and you would have gotten along well! Maybe that's why I always cheered for the Canadiens??? Keep the posts coming!

Reply
Monica
4/12/2018 06:48:59 pm

It's not too late to switch teams, Di.

Monica
4/12/2018 06:45:24 pm

Since you were sooooo supportive when I came out about that other thing, Michael, I will cut you some slack on this one. xo

Reply
Patti Phillips
4/12/2018 02:39:53 pm

All I can say is your timing sucks! If you've known for so long, why couldn't you have come out when the Jets weren't the only other Canadian team in the playoffs? Which could have been basically any other year)?

I always thought you and the Jets would have been such a logical match. You even lived together for many years!

I still think you should reconsider. The Jets are also blue and white, with a very attractive hint of red. It's not too late to change your mind. You'd be so much happier as a Jets fan.

Reply
Monica
4/12/2018 06:22:25 pm

I can go both ways! Go Jets!

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